My Blog:  My Journey with Dementia – Intro

My name is Mark Aloway. I will be doing this blog of My Journey with Dementia.

It will be my blog about the many trials and tribulations of having Dementia.

The blog will not be written every day. Sometimes I forget that I have the blog.

My hope is that whoever reads this blog will walk with me through the days and years of my journey.

Please share this blog with anyone that you think may benefit with learn more about the Dementia and how it affects one’s day to day activities.

My Journey with Dementia – Blog#1

Hello. My name is Mark Aloway and I am 67 years old. I am retired from the US Air Force and the Veterans Administration. I am also a disabled Veteran. Last year I was diagnosed with Vascular Mild Cognitive Impairment. It is the very early stage of dementia. More of that diagnosis later.

My experience with dementia and Alzheimer’s goes back 17 years. My mother was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease in 2004. Soon thereafter I went to the local Alzheimer’s Association Chapter in Little Rock, Arkansas to find out all the information I could about the disease. I was retired at the time and I had all the time needed to do my research. I felt that the more I learned I could be of a better resource for my family and friends in helping Mom.

Mom has been in a facility for several years. She is slowly going down. It is sad to see her slow decline. She has started to get very angry about everything. We go and see her every week. Sometimes twice or more a week depending on her needs. My sister Vicky is the primary caregiver and I am second. When Vicky is out of pocket or out of town I will step up for her care.

My history with the Alzheimer’s Association is very diverse. I have worked with the Association as an employee, community educator, support group facilitator, support group mentor and lately I have been on the Board of Directors. I am fully dedicated to all functions of the Association. I have been a Team Captain for the Walk to End Alzheimer’s. I has been very rewarding to help out in any way I can. If you or your organization would like to participate in the Walk in your area, go to www.alz.org and find the walk in your area and sign up. You will not be disappointed.

Almost two years ago my wife Edie started noticing a few changes in me. It was my behavior, speech, and other daily routines that seemed to be off. She has been with me in all of our Alzheimer’s endeavors. So she was very aware of the signs of Dementia. She is the one that suggested that I may need to see someone about my changes. I talked with my PCP to get an appointment with a Neurophysiologist to do some testing. I finally got an appointment with the doctor for the tests. Four and a half hours later all the test were over. I was told that it would be a few weeks to get an appointment to discuss the results. Then COVID hit. Appointment was cancelled. No more face-to-face appointments. I had to have a virtual appointment. I finally got that appointment for a call. My wife was with me as we used the phone with the speaker phone set up. The doctor was very good at explaining all the results. It is not what I and my wife was expecting. It also showed what I did not want to here. Vascular Mild Cognitive Impairment was the diagnosis.

It hit me like a ton of bricks. It could not be right. I have been doing all the correct things for my mind and body. We ate the right foods. We worked out at the gym and took long walks together. As I said before, I had been using my abilities to each groups around the state on Alzheimer’s and Dementia. It could not be the correct diagnosis. I was devastated. I really wanted to cry. Why me.

Since my diagnosis, it has been a real challenge. Edie and I have been very careful about everything that we do. I noticed that I was not able to concentrate on things. I would forget to take my medicines. I have several other disabilities that require me to take my meds three times a day. Unfortunately, I have to take a total of 27 pills a day. It may be some of the problems that has caused me to be diagnosed with VMCI. I have has 3 maybe four TIAs (mini-strokes), several concussions with one I was out for a few minutes. Many of these could have contributed to my diagnosis.

We have been seeing a therapist weekly to work on my cognitive skills. I find it very useful to talk about my issues. I am not ashamed of the diagnosis. Why should I? It is like any other disease. I t was not caused by me. Are people with cancer ashamed, NO. Are people with can heart disease ashamed, No. This is a disease that may or may not have been genetic. Since my mother has Alzheimer’s, I had a higher possibility of getting the disease. The percentage of getting the disease if you mother has it than if your father had it.

This blog will be for me to talk about my day-to-day situations, feelings, and decline. I will not be writing every day, but will highlight problems and issues as the disease progress.

I you have any questions, please email me at artyhog1@outlook.com or send me comments through this blog. If you want me to elaborate on anything, just let me know.

My Journey with Dementia – Blog#2

What is it like to have a diagnosis of Mild Cognitive Impairment?

It is scary as all heck. As I stated in Blog#1, I have a very good grasp of Alzheimer’s and other Dementias. I have taught classes on this subject to many different groups. As mentioned, before I a am on the Board of Directors for the Arkansas Chapter of the Alzheimer’s Association. I have asked the Executive Director that if she thought that maybe I need to step down. She says no. She says that I have a vast knowledge of the disease and could be invaluable to others. I have held many Support Groups and Mentored several other Support Group Facilitators. That is the problem. I know what is going to happen to me. I know how it is going to affect my family.

Sometimes I get very depressed and very sad, even to the point of crying. I think of what my Wife of 49 years has got to go through. We have a great relationship imbued with the present of God in our lives and marriage. I have to rely on that presence in my day-to-day activities.

There are days that I don’t even want to go out of the house. There are days that I only want to go out and just drive around to get my mind off of my situation. When I am at home and feeling down, I would go to my laptop and listen to music or to my Mindful meditation links. It seems that music really takes my mind off the day-to-day struggles.

I have always been person that could multitask on a daily basis. Now I am single task orientated. If I am doing something around the house and I get distracted, I have difficulty in getting back on task. It is very frustrating at times. Another issue that I have is communications. I was used to b able to talk everyone’s ears off. Now I stumble for words that I know. The words are in my mind but I cannot get them to come out of my mouth. My wife know that I am having difficulty and would finish my sentences. I ask her to not help me all the time. I want to try to get out the message that I am trying to say. She is very patience with me. I have encountered others that I feel aren’t as understanding. It is very frustrating.

As mentioned before, my mother has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. We keep my mental and physical issues away from her. I don’t want her to have to worry about me when she is going through her adventure. Sometime it is very aggravating to be with her since she is hard of hearing and won’t wear her hearing aids whenever she can find them. I too am hard of hearing. We normally got to her room in her facility and talk since we seem to b yelling at each other. It really gets to Edie. We visit her every week and bring her candy, puzzle books and cards. Her room is like a furnace. Edie sometimes has to leave the room to go to a common area to cool off. I stay to be with mon. It is not easy to be with her when I am feeling down. It is going to get worse.

I am seeing a therapist every week at the VA. She is great. She will listen to all my thoughts and concerns without judgement. She is encouraging and uplifting. I feel better after our sessions. I look forward to our sessions I feel very comfortable talking to her about any and all issues. At first Edie and my daughters went with me to the sessions. Sometimes it is only Edie that goes with me. They can fill in the gaps of the events of the past week since our last session. I am very open to the therapist on all matters; I am not ashamed to talk about it. It is good to get it off my chest and not be judged. Many times, I have even cried in out sessions because of the subjects we discuss. She and Edie are very supportive. Since the COVID is getting worse in our area, the VA has limited to visitors to the clinics to the Vet only. I worry that if it goes to that, I will be in the sessions and not remember all that I need to talk about. So far so good.

To wrap this up for today, I want to encourage you to get informed about dementia and how it effects the person and family if you have a loved one with dementia.

The Alzheimer’s Association is a great source of information and support. Their website www.alz.org has a tremendous amount of information about all different forms of dementia. Try it out.

The Association has a crisis line as well. If you are in need of a personal touch, give them a call. All the individuals are highly qualified to help you. Their number is 1-800-272-3900. It is on line 24 hours a day.

My Journey with Dementia – Blog#3

I had the privilege of being interviewed by the Arkansas Democrat/Gazette in March 2021 about the problems people with dementia had with the pandemic restrictions.  Teresa Moss did an excellent job of reporting what we discussed in the article.

Here is the link to the newspaper article.

https://www.arkansasonline.com/news/2021/mar/22/pandemic-an-awful-reality-for-those-with-dementia/

I also did a tv interview with Cassandra Webb with KARK Channel 4 and Fox16 in NWA on the new Alzheimer’s drug.  The new drug is called Aduhelm.

New Alzheimer’s drug giving hope to patients, but concerns grow over high costs

Please enjoy both items.  I am proud of how they both turned out.

The Alzheimer’s Association is a great source of information and support. Their website www.alz.org has a tremendous amount of information about all different forms of dementia. Try it out.

The Association has a crisis line as well. If you are in need of a personal touch, give them a call. All the individuals are highly qualified to help you. Their number is 1-800-272-3900. It is on line 24 hours a day.