My Journey with Dementia – Blog#5

My hospital experience.

The past two days have been very difficult for me.  Monday started out like every other day.  Got up had coffee, did my 30-minute walk, took a shower and got dressed.  I sat down to watch a little tv.  While sitting down I felt something funny in my chest.  All of a sudden it felt like someone put an elephant on my chest.  My blood pressure (BP) went up.  I got Edie to take me to the VA hospital ER.  Sure enough, I was taken back right away in front of a few other veterans that was already there.  Edie was sent away.  With COVID she was not able to come in with me, even at the ER.  More on that later.

I was put in one of the rooms.  My BP was taken and it read 197/113 with pulse of 101. Of course, they immediately gave me a Nitro pill.  They had me lay there until a doctor could see me.  The ER was full.  Strange for a Monday morning.  I still had the bad pressure in my chest.  The BP came down but the pressure did not leave.  I was admitted to the hospital.  While on the ward, my BP went up again.  Another Nitro pill.  This time it did nothing.  A cardiologist came to see me.  She was very concerned that the pill did not work effectively.  She determined that I need to be on a Nitro Drip.  I was sent to the ICU to have the drip placed in my arm.  Very scary.

 I did not know what to think.  My mind started racing.  Since Edie helps me remember things, I did not have her.  The Doctors and nurses were asking me questions rapid fire.  I just shook my head.  I could tell from their tone of voice (all of us had masks on) that they were not understanding why I could not remember past problems.  I had to tell them that I have a memory problem and that all my past medical issues were in my VA medical records.  I have only used the VA for medical care since I retired from the Air Force in 1997.

The biggest problem was when I was left alone. My mind started wandering.  I tried to remember everything that was said to me at the hospital.  I had to ask the attendings to repeat themselves several times.  It got very frustrating with myself because I would freeze up and not be able to get the words out.  They keep bombarding me with past medical questions. I had to say that I didn’t remember.  That all my past medical problems were in their records. Things finally calmed down with the questions. The nurses on the ward and in the ICU could not have been any kinder.  They were patient with asking questions.

Again, I was left alone. My mind was racing. The ICU was very quiet since the other patients were asleep.  I got there after 11pm.  After getting hooked up with all the wires and Nitro IV drip, it became pretty scarry.  I starting the think of all sorts of scenarios of what was going to happen net.  One of the side affects of the Nitro drip was a severe headache.  Trying to go to sleep to ease my mind was impossible.  I just laid there looking around the room and staring at the ceiling.  Sleep just wood not come.  My head was pounding.  The only thing that I could have was a Tylenol pill.  It did nothing.  I was going the have a heart catheter that next morning so I couldn’t have anything drink or eat.

At least if Edie had been with me, we could talk and get the pain off my mind hopefully.  The night nurse was very sympathetic.  He tried to talk to me but he had other patients to take care of. It was a long night.  Only thing I did was texting to Edie to let her know what was happening.  She wished that she could be with me.  Stupid COVID. Just lying there listening to the beep, beep, beep of the monitor was my way to try to get my mind off things.  I dosed off a few times.  I woke up a couple of times confused as to where I was. I even reached over to touch Edie but of course she wasn’t there.  Morning came slowly.  When it did, there was more hustle and bustle. I could hear the nurses talking I the background.  Not really understanding what they were saying but it was comfortable to hear voice that were not in my head.

It was time for me to go to the Cath lab.  It was good to get out of my room and see different things.  I was traveling down the hall that I had tread many times as a VA employee.  In the Cath lab, everyone was so professional.  It   Better new was that the Nitro drip w me at ease.  After waking up I was taken back to my ICU room.  The doctor had called Edie to let her know the finding of the procedures.  She came to my bedside to talk to me.  No heart attack.  Great news.  They were sill confused as to why I was in such pain and my BP was still high.  They deduced that my issues may be GI problems.  A consult was placed for me to go see the GI clinic.

The best news was that I was going home. After getting my new meds and discharge paperwork I was escorted downstairs to get in my an and go home.  Seeing Edie really made me forget my problems for a while.  Her smiling face really made me happy.

I was going home to my safe place.